Overprotective Parenting – How My Mother Deceived Me About Something I Ought to Have Known Better!


A person with a sunset in the background

When I was growing up, my mother used to make a lot of comments to me about how overprotective can parents be to their children. I always thought that was kind of funny until I got to think about it sometime later. Here is what she said about many parents: “My kids turn into everything I don’t want for them.”

Overprotective

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She said she was referring to her children, but that made it all the more true. I suppose I should mention here that she didn’t use the word overprotective, so I thought that was pretty accurate. So, what did she mean by being overprotective? She was saying that her children were going to be too protective of her in January and June. Here are the dates when she mentioned those two periods in her statement:

During January and June. You might think that she was only talking about summer, but that could not be farther from the truth. That would be the same period when my Mom would get those nasty, purple, heart balloon bouquets delivered to her house, which I will never forget. I can also say that my Mom’s helicopter parents were the ones who put the giant stuffed polar bear on top of her desk during the teacher’s break.

There are so many other ways that January and June could overlap. And June is right around the corner! That’s right, my Mom is expecting another baby very soon. I don’t know if she realizes it or not, but she is probably acting like she has to have another baby by the end of the year or before the next academic year begins.

Protective Parenting

A man and a woman sitting on a cutting board

So what makes my Mom think she has to have another baby in late January or before the next summer? I believe that my Mom is acting out a protective parenting behavior (that she learned from her helicopter parents) that is overdone. She thinks that if she lets herself relax and waits until after the holidays to start preparing, that everything will go smoothly and she will have a baby in late February or early March. My solution to this problem is to start preparing a month in advance so that my Mom will have time to get through the normal amount of stress that pregnancy and birth-related circumstances cause.

My solution isn’t a solution at all, more like a preemptive strike against unnecessary worry. I want to make sure that my Mom is ready for the changes that pregnancy and birth bring. I want to make sure that my Mom is ready for a long, healthy pregnancy, and that she isn’t overprepared for the demands of raising a child. I want to make sure that my Mom doesn’t think that there is any way that she can avoid doing her responsibilities to our family or taking care of herself and the new baby. And I want to make sure that my Mom is prepared for the changes that the coming months will bring us.

Communicate Well

The best way for me to accomplish these goals is to talk to my Mom on the phone every single day. I want to make sure that we are on the same page as far as parenting strategies and parenting plans are concerned. I know that my Mom is very sensitive to things like overprotective parenting and she isn’t going to appreciate it if I don’t tell her what I want her to do. It might take some encouragement though; if you are overprotective and don’t let your kids experience life without excessive stress, then I’m sure that your parenting plan is working for you!

One final point that I’d like to make about Janie and the things she does for us: if you are a working mom and you want to do something different for your family than heading off to a public school field trip, then go for it! Parents need to do things for their kids that are outside the norm for most families. They are the experts on what’s best for their kids and they should make that decision for them. There is no shame in deciding to go to a sleepover or to do something a little extra special for your child because you know that it will improve their lives. Do it now!

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